My 2 Cents

I never listened to Imus, even when he was a local boy here in Cleveland. For that matter I never listened to Stern when he was on the public airwaves. And that is how I let the radio stations and advertisers know what I think of their programming. I would have never known what Imus said last week if it wasn't for the "mainstream" media. So why is this malicious outburst, or maybe a slip of the tongue, making the news? Not just news...but the lead story on every program I've seen!

Forget the war, forget poverty, forget the sick and the hungry...the world as we know it will end if Imus is not fired and taken off the air. The world is in much better shape than I thought.

Between me and the walls, there is way too much time, print and airways wasted on one persons' stupid comments. I'm dumbfounded and flabbergasted.....I have to get back to reality. Oh yeah, and all of you that are offended....change the channel.

And......
Will the real-life "nappy-haired ho" who spent North Carolina's money and resources, who ruined the life of a coach and several players, be apologizing? Will it be the lead story for the next week? Will Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson be out front leading the charge? No time for that....need to get Imus off the air.

Grumpy Editor dot com

Here is an interesting blog that provides "Critical observations of print/broadcast/Web media plus public relations and advertising." Check it out here: http://GrumpyEditor.com

Hello Goodbye

My mom died this week. It was not unexpected, it was not sudden....it was a shock, though. She was 85 years old. Failing eyes with macular degeneration and failing ears, had really put her into a great depression. The last 3 years had been a downward spiral with the last year spent at the nursing home. Her husband of 64 years was at her side. Despite our often ambivalent relationship, I have always admired the strength and independence it took to run from their homeland to avoid the Russian invasion. With the clothes on their back they strived to make a new home and to raise a daughter and son. There are many stories that I need to write down. But for now I'll leave you with this poem from an unknown author.

Your mother is always with you...
She's the whisper of the leaves
as you walk down the street.

She's the smell of bleach in
your freshly laundered socks.

She's the cool hand on your
brow when you're not well.

Your mother lives inside
your laughter. She's crystallized
in every tear drop...

She's the place you came from,
your first home.. She's the map you
follow with every step that you take.

She's your first love and your first heart
break....and nothing on earth can separate you.

Not time, Not space...
Not even death....
will ever separate you
from your mother....

You carry her inside of you....

Death Becomes You

It's snowing, snowing and snowing in northeast Ohio as in most of the Midwest. So I finally get some time to just sit home, surf the Internet, and contemplate the shoveling of my driveway. Okay, so dress in layers, put the beer down, and keep my back straight. Forget about it. If I do that now, I'll have to do it 3 or 4 more times before the snow stops. Wait until tomorrow and call a snow plow....yeah, that's the ticket....circumventing the "big one" while snow shoveling.

Confronting death can be scary, depressing, and disturbing. For some, it's just plain impossible, and they think they'll live forever. But consider if you do actually die, you can kick up the wake a notch in your own custom coffin.

"Richard Mullard chuckles when he thinks about his funeral. It's not that he thinks death is a laughing matter -- he just relishes the thought of someone trying to fit him into a hearse while he's wearing skis and lying in a sled-shaped coffin."

3-Handed Driving

So I was driving down the road, not too fast on a residential street, watching an SUV approach in the opposite direction. The woman driver (no stereotyping implied :-), was talking on her cell phone held by her left hand. Her right hand was on the steering wheel with a cigarette held between fingers. Do you see it coming? I did.

She takes her hand off the wheel to take a drag, then stretches her arm in front of her face to flick the ash through the crack in the window. The car drifts to the right. Pop! She takes the mirror off the side of a parked car. Idiot!

I could tell she not only is in a panic state now, but totally embarrassed as I drove by. I drive an SUV also, which you know is wider and taller than a standard car, so it wasn't until then that she noticed the police car behind me. I held back the laughter until later, but my smile was wide.

I'm not sure if I would blame this on smoking or phoning while driving, but either way, what an idiot. Here's another encounter with cell phones.

English is Crazy

Reasons why the English language is hard to learn:

1. The farm was used to produce produce.
   
2. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
   
3. We must polish the Polish furniture.
   
4. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
   
5. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
   
6. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
   
7. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
   
8. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
   
9. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
   
10. I did not object to the object.
    
11. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
    
12. They were too close to the door to close it.
    
13. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
    
14. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
    
15. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
    
16. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
    
17. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
    
18. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
    
19. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
    
20. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
    

It's Over

Congratulations to all the political winners....and losers. Now get your signs out of all the intersections and off the billboards. I've got my TV back and soon all the front yards will be clean again.

And next time let's pass a law: only one sign per location per candidate. Why do you need sign after sign within 10 feet of your last sign? For that matter, commercial after commercial within 30 seconds of your last commercial? I hope your leadership skills are more precise that your sign placement skills. Or maybe it's just that the one with the most signs wins!

No Sh!t Sherlock

"Post-prediction:"

Declaring their month-earlier report "a bust," widely watched forecasters at Colorado State University said they expect the overall 2006 Atlantic hurricane season to be "slightly below" average, instead of more active than normal.

Projections were upended by unexpected high concentrations of dry West African dust which sapped moisture from the atmosphere, eliminating a critical component of storm formation, forecasters said.

Instead of four named storms, three hurricanes and one intense hurricane, August featured just a fairly meek Hurricane Ernesto.

State of Confusion

Did you know that there are now 50 million blogs? That 175,000 blogs are started every day? That 7,200 are created every hour? A very interesting article about blogging, State of the Blogosphere. So many to read, so little time. And then try to write for several? I'm looking for shortcuts in everything I do. Hopefully my Orgasmitron will arrive soon, reminiscent of Woody Allen's Sleeper :-)

Tort Reform Please

Why would anyone not want our country to find terrorists? There are some liberal assholes that think that the government is listening in to their "private" conversations. Most likely they are worried there spouses might find out about there secret lives. Come on, are you serious? You're suing VZ because of what?Verizon Sued for Giving NSA Phone Records

Good Friday?

So why is it called "good?" Seems peculiar don't you think? Some of you don't even know what I'm talking about or give a rat's-ass if you do.

It's a pretty solemn day for the Christians out there. Me? Born and raised Roman Catholic. I was even an altar boy in Catholic grade school and high school. Back then it was "good" Friday because we got off school. Of course, we were expected to spend much of that day in church.

Anyway, I found that "good-bye" is a derivative of "God be with you." So possibly, "Good" Friday was at some time "God's" Friday. And the way the English language is derived (slaughtered), it was transformed. Even if this is not true, it sits well with me. Maybe it can all be traced back to Daniel Webster misspelling God and added another 'o'. Good or bad, have a Happy Easter. And for you non-believers, Happy Weekend!"

Random Thoughts

It has been a long while since my last brain dump. Taking care of elderly parents, their household and their care while taking care of your own has really got my butt dragging'. The month of February whooped me good with a cold/flu/sinus infection combo that hung around for 6 weeks. I did lose 5 pounds though....a good thing. I'll need to get sick about 4 more times to reach my goal :-)

Driving around town is about the only way I keep up with local news...or any news for that matter... radio is still a good medium. Locally we had a trial for a man who beat, killed, beheaded and burned (yes, on fire) a "friend". He was found guilty. But then, rather than exercising the death penalty, the jury sentenced him to "life imprisonment without the possibility of parole". What a crock of crap. Sure the first few months, even the first few years will seem like punishment, but he'll get used to it and he will be provided 3 square meals, medical care, personal care....all using our tax dollars. In the meantime, we'll still have homeless and hungry families, poorly educated children, all while increasing taxes. Of course if he was sentenced to death it would still take about 20 years before it would happen. Still, 20 years of housing and care is cheaper than 60 years (yes, he's a young man).

And another thing, illegal aliens. What part of "illegal" do you not understand? I don't want to stop the immigrants, I want them to knock on our door, ask if they can come in and sign 'em up. That's what my mom and dad did 60 years ago. I want everybody to enjoy this melting pot and have their own American dream. I also want them to pay taxes, pay for health insurance, pay for school books, get a driver's license and a social security card. I think they should know about the roots of this country, our constitution and its laws. And speak the language. I know a little Spanish, French and a bit more Lithuanian. When I visited Montreal and Mexico, I learned enough French and Spanish to ask where the bathroom is without yelling and pointing to my crotch.

WWJD

I'm sure you've all seen the bracelets on some people and asked "What does that mean?" The answer is "What Would Jesus Do?" And I'm sure there is a deep, spiritual explanation for it all. But (there's always a but), I came across a survey that asked "what would Jesus have on his iPod?" Well....13% say he would listen to Christian Rock, 11% the Songs of King David, 11% classic rock, 7% gospel, and 3% hip-hop. Drum roll please....and 55% believe that Jesus would not own a digital music player.

So I thought I'd look a little deeper and see what I could come up with on the Net. I came across WhatWouldJesusDo.com a website that let's you buy anything with the letters imprinted on the object. Then, if you're into ouiji, here's an online WWJD Ouiji board to answer your questions.

Check out what would Jesus drive? Or how about "when life throws you a curveball, what would Judas do? And finally, what would Jesus be doing with his time?....Protesting Wal-Mart.

Sweet Revenge

Mouse Thrown Into Fire Sets Home Ablaze
Associated Press

A mouse got its revenge against a homeowner who tried to dispose of it in a pile of burning leaves. The blazing creature ran back to the man's house and set it on fire.

Luciano Mares, 81, of Fort Sumner said he caught the mouse inside his house and wanted to get rid of it.

"I had some leaves burning outside, so I threw it in the fire, and the mouse was on fire and ran back at the house," Mares said from a motel room Saturday.

Village Fire Chief Juan Chavez said the burning mouse ran to just beneath a window, and the flames spread up from there and throughout the house.

No was hurt inside, but the home and everything in it was destroyed.

Unseasonably dry and windy conditions have charred more than 53,000 acres and destroyed 10 homes in southeastern New Mexico in recent weeks.

"I've seen numerous house fires," village Fire Department Capt. Jim Lyssy said, "but nothing as unique as this one."

You Just Can't Win

So I was working on getting my New Year's Resolutions together, and I came upon a quote by comedian Vic Oliver that just begs me to ask, "Why try?"

If a man is after money, he's money mad; if he keeps it, he's a capitalist; if he spends it, he's a playboy; if he doesn't get it, he's a never-do-well; if he doesn't try to get it, he lacks ambition. If he gets it without working for it; he's a parasite; and if he accumulates it after a life time of hard work, people call him a fool who never got anything out of life.

Politically Correct

For all of you "politically correct" citizens, please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006,

For everyone else, I wish you a very Merry Christmas and a healthy and prosperous New Year!

My Resume II

I worked at Intel for a while, but my eyes were giving me trouble. I asked my boss "why can't IC?" He gave me the name of his brother-in-law who was in the carpentry business. I went to that job site and picked up a hammer and saw.

Wanted: psychopaths. . . .

Since I trade the market, I found this article very interesting - Wanted: psychopaths to play the stock market.

...But now a study by a group of eminent American academics suggests that star performers on the stock market may be even worse and could best be described as “functioning psychopaths”.

In a study of investors’ behavior, the team from three US universities suggest that people with brain damage can make better financial decisions than the rest of us.

My Home Town

Seth Godin declared Akron dead. After a few days of reactionary email and blog postings, he apologized, sort of.

When I wrote my Akron post I suspected I'd get flack for it, but I had no idea how personal the attacks would be.

I've lived here the better part of 37 years, except for several years on the East Coast in the mid to late 80s and growing up in Cleveland in the 50's and 60s. I think it's nicer here than NJ/NY. And seeing what's going on in the Gulf of Mexico I sure would not want to live there.

Akron has affected our country in many ways....actors, astronauts, sports, scientists, politicians, music. Wow, come to think of it Akron means a lot to the world. Chrissie Hynde, Hugh Downs, Lebron James, Rita Dove, Charlie Frye, Angie Everhart, oh yeah, there's a whole bunch more. Rubber, polymers, poetry, journalism, aerospace, construction, medicine....Akron is alive.

There are cycles in everything, towns included. But I can't think of this town as dead, or even dying. And the Akron Zoo beats many I've visited. It's worth a trip to Akron....just don't eat the bread.

the nonist

Okay, here's something a little different: a website for...ah, well....I'm not sure. the nonist.

first and foremost the nonist is a website. it is a loose aggregation of individuals with a rather oblique organizing principle. it is a repository for things of interest. it is purty. it is approachable. it is chock full of words and phrases. it is evolving. it is growing. it is occasionally grumpy, curmudgeonly, and misanthropic.

there is a growing epidemic in the cyberworld. a scourge which causes more suffering with each passing day. as blogging has exploded and, under the stewardship of the veterans, the form has matured more and more bloggers are finding themselves disillusioned, dissatisfied, taking long breaks, and in many cases simply closing up shop.

Use it or Lose it

It's been a rough summer with the usual making a living doldrums, made more so by the constant 90 degree, no rain, very humid weather. But it cooled a bit today just touching 70 degrees and this evening going into the 50's and possibly the 40's. Seems I can think again.

The toughest thing I had to do this summer was put mom into a nursing home. Hopefully it's temporary. She needs to tone up a bit and walk and move around more than she did in July. For the whole month she basically stayed in bed, just getting up to eat and pee. Eventually even those activities stopped as her body de-conditioned. If you don't use it, you lose it. And at that age you lose it fast.

I review the circumstances and look for an event that triggered all this, but cannot find one. What should I do?

She's been in for almost 3 weeks now and it seems to be working. Her color is back, she's sitting up, getting up and walking with a walker. But, and this is a big but, she doesn't seem to care anymore. She fights the staff that makes her get up and walk, or she says she doesn't want to eat, or this or that. "Just leave me alone and let me die," she sighs every time I visit. Sure there's a bit of senility in her words, but the mind is still okay, the body is still okay. Not what it used to be, but not so horrific that you would count it a blessing to die.

So all I can really do is be a cheerleader, sit and visit, and tell her to walk a little more, eat a little more. The more you eat, the more you walk, the sooner you can go home. But...."Just let me die."

Clean Underwear

With the recent increase in security measures dealing with terrorism, some inconveniences have become a routine part of our world. I don't have a problem with random searches. I've been pulled aside several times at various airports. I also don't mind if everybody knows what I'm reading. I post it on this site in matter of fact. So why do civil libertarians complain? What is so bad about a search or checking on my reading preferences? I would, by far, mind getting blown up more than someone searching through my underwear or know what book I've checked out!

D-I-Y

If you're a homeowner and into the do-it-yourself phase of life, check out HouseBlogs.net, a virtual neighborhood of home improvement blogs. I spent the whole evening taking a tour of everybody's money pit...I mean project. I especially enjoyed House in Progress, and loved their byline: "We call it home IMPROVEMENT because it can't get any worse."

Tomorrow?

No! Do it today. I'm definitely a procrastinator, always jumping from task to task on my to-do list. But, I keep learning and keep trying. Putting things off seldom improves the quality of my work. And it adds stress when I know that I have something to do that should have already been done.

So, here's how I've been attacking it:

• If something comes up that will take 5 minutes, I don't write it down...I just do it.
• I write my to-do list twice a day. It helps me focus on what needs to be done while basking in the tasks I've completed.
• Install a spam filter. It takes too much time scanning the Viagra emails looking for what really counts.
• I'm not a morning person, so I take on the creative projects in the afternoon and evening. Get in tune with your personal peak time.

Friday the 13th

I know 2 different versions of how this came about: 1.) There were the mythological 12 demigods who were joined by a 13th, an evil one, who brought misfortune upon humans. 2.) It was also said that Christ was crucified on Friday and the number of guests at the party of the Last Supper was 13, with the 13th guest being Judas, the traitor. I would think that this would have evolved into "Thursday the 13th" as being unlucky or having an uneven number to a dinner party as a no-no. Learn more about paraskevidekatriaphobia.

Blog by Phone

When my cell phone died a couple weeks ago, I picked up a new Treo 650 by PalmOne at my local Sprint store. Now, I have combined my phone, iPAQ PDA and digital camera into one device I can carry in my shirt pocket. Since it has web access, I thought I would try blogging via my Treo. Tada! Here it is.

Home Office Success

Found this on MSN: 5 Home Office Success Stories. Interesting stories on how life is better when you have a home office.

E-mail Reduces IQ

A study, carried out at the Institute of Psychiatry, found excessive use of technology reduced workers' intelligence - Infomania worse than marijuana. Oh boy! And I just upgraded my computer.

Offline affects Online

The death of Pope John Paul II has increased visitor traffic to Web sites of all religious denominations in yet another show of offline events affecting online behavior.

The 84-year-old pontiff's death generated more online searches from people seeking additional information on him. For the week ending April 2, searches of the keyword "pope john paul" were up 3,161 percent, "pope" 2,801 percent and "pope john paul ii" 2,307 percent.

I guess we Internet geeks are not in "a world of our own."

Breaking Routines Redux

And then again, some routines can't be broken. I'm on call with my parents to help them when they need help. That usually means driving them to doctor's appointments and helping around the house. They're both in their mid-80's and are showing their age. (I sure do hope I've inherited some of those genes.) Dad still drives around the neighborhood to church, bank, grocery store and the like, but stays off the expressway and any cross-town journeys.

He awoke early Friday morning with some pain in his arm and chest, got up, took some Tylenol, and went back to sleep. My sister is a registered nurse and upon hearing of this took him to his doctor, who in turn sent him over to emergency. Some of the tests came back questionable so they decided to keep him for the weekend.

So I went over to see how Mom was doing and it was cold inside the house, well cold by her standards (68). I went into the basement to check on the furnace, flipped all the switches and checked all the fuses. There was only one thing left to check, the oil tank. . . . the empty oil tank.

I left a message with the fuel distributor, but being Sunday afternoon I knew it would be at least morning before I heard anything. It wasn't life threatening cold and she wanted to stay at home so I brought some of my ceramic heaters over to help mediate the temperature. Actually the afternoon sun hits the house and it gets quite warm, but as soon as the sun sets, it cools off.

Meanwhile at the hospital, my Dad's blood enzyme test proves he did not have a heart attack, but a cat scan shows a small aneurysm on his aorta. It's a difficult operation for anyone, but for an 86-year-old man, it may not work. Instead they give him some new prescriptions and modify several of his existing blood pressure pills and said, "Let's keep an eye on it."

So, we add a cardiologist to his list of a half-dozen or so doctors he visits regularly and I add another appointment to my calendar. It was a busy 4 days and I'm exhausted. My Dad looks like he just came home after a vacation and is raring to go. Oh well, I'm glad they're both still with us. And I have to get back to work.

Game Time!

Play this game and you will not be able to do anything else for quite a while, very, very addictive. The objective of GridGame is to get a chain reaction of tiles as long as possible. Once you click on a tile you'll see how it works. You need the Flash plugin to make it work. My best score: 2073 2187.

Protect Your Banana

Forget the innuendo. Check out this protection device: Banana Bunker

Is God on the Internet?

Most of these chain e-mails end up in my Junk Mail folder, but this one found its way through.

Bishop T.D. Jakes "8 Second Prayer." Just repeat this prayer and see how God moves!! "Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen." Pass this message to 8 people. I hope that you don't ignore this and let God bless you.

The prayer does not bother me, I use something similar every day. But the medium does. Well that and the directive. Why eight people? Wouldn't more be better? I mean the more spam you send out the more attention will be drawn to you and more people will remember you as intruding into their lives. Just think, that growing list, 8 times 8 times 8 times 8 and on and on, will cause some life or business threatening communication to be dumped into a delete or junk folder. Boy, God will be proud of you then.

You may think you are helping yourself or your friends, but your contact information will end up being circulated around the world uncontrollably. You will get more and more spam because you propagate the chain letter. Once you forward that letter, your name and e-mail address, along with those of anyone you send it to, are attached to each message you send. You can't predict who may get that information in the future nor control what they do with it.

Spend some time at BreakTheChain.org to learn about stopping junk e-mail and misinformation.

Working At Home

Working from home has some great advantages: you get to "be there" for the cable guy, plumber or repairman, you avoid that awful time-consuming commute and you get to work in your underwear, pajamas, or nothing at all. I get a lot of work done and I probably work harder at home than when I had an office to go to everyday.

It's not like I work off the kitchen table or a corner of a bedroom. I can since my computer network is wireless and I do move around the house with my laptop for variety. But, I have an office of about 200 square feet plus another 100sf in storage closets. There's a second office for my fax machine with another desk for when I do need some extra help. My office even has its own bathroom, refrigerator and television (I have to have my CNBC). The U-shaped, built-in desk would be about 23 feet long if straightened out, and it gives me space for 4 computers, 2 printers and 4 lateral files.

But, no matter how hard I work or how successful I become, it’s impossible to convince my family and especially my parents that I actually have a job. I haven't hit them up for money in years, so you would think that would tell them something. But no. Every time I see them I get the inquisition, "Where is it you work? What is it you do?"

It's been tough enough just describing my consulting work, I wouldn't dare say I'm a writer. My dad worked for one company for 33 years before retiring. And that was 20 years ago. He's set in his perception of the working life. So, since I spend a lot of time at my client locations, I drop a few names and tell them, "I'm working here today and there tomorrow." That appeases them and makes them feel better. At some level, everybody who doesn't work at home has a suspicion that you're getting away with something. They think that you sleep in late, slop around in your pajamas and slippers and watch TV all day.

But anyway, I like working at the office, I mean at home. Sure sometimes I wish I had more space or more help, but I remember when I was babysitting managing employees and shudder at the thought. This is better. . .way better. I'm sure the other 11 million home-based business owners would agree.

EPIC

The "Evolving Personalized Information Construct" is a scary mini-movie which charts the evolution of media from 1984 up until 2014. Yes, 2014, a short time from now. Produced by The Museum of Media History, this work timelines the demise of the Press as we know it. The first 20 years is all fact-based and the last 10 years is fiction. . . or is it?

EPIC produces a custom content package for each user, using his choices, his consumption habits, his interests, his demographics, his social network - to shape the product.

Inspirational Diary

Ivan Noble has died. He personified courage and determination. You see, Ivan found out two years ago that he had a brain tumor and has kept the world up-to-date in his trials and tribulations. His diary begins at I have a brain tumor and ends at The time has come.

What I wanted to do with this column was try to prove that it was possible to survive and beat cancer and not to be crushed by it. Even though I have to take my leave now. I feel like I managed it. I have not been defeated.

Adding Words

A new survey has found that 62 percent of Americans have never heard the word "blog," and don't know what a blog is. Luckily, the word has recently been added to the Oxford English Dictionary. Just make sure you're buying the latest addition before shelling out the 900 bucks!

Computer Users Anonymous Redux

After writing the previous blog entry, I continued to research computer user addiction. It seems that all the information I found was circa mid-1990's. Was it just a fad? Is computer/net addiction a thing of the past? I think not.

I remember when there were only a few hundred websites to go to. There was no Google, no Internet Explorer. Online research was performed via character-based tools like Archie, DejaNews and Veronica. Search tools would boast about "thousands of links." Now search engines talk about millions and billions of links. In 1980 there were 200 computers on the Internet. Now over 300 million!

I think it is commonplace to spend time in front of your computer and no one thinks twice. It's acceptable to be "addicted" so it's not a big deal, and thus no modern help for the "computer addicted." It's just part of the job, much like the 3-martini lunch used to be.

Humbled by Nature

I have just spent 2 days and 3 nights in my cold, dark home without electricity. The recent ice storms to hit the Midwest left its mark. Those 51 hours were by far the longest time I have experienced without electrons in my wires.

When the power went out during the first night, I was awoken by the dogs barking at our beeping alarm system. After disarming the racket all I could say was, "Oh well, let's all get back to sleep and it will be fine by morning." (Temp = 68)

By morning, nothing yet. (Temp = 61) Couldn't check my e-mail nor catch up on the morning news. Since our water heater works with gas, I took a hot shower and went off to visit a few clients, stopped by Borders, and then Barnes. Caught up on the news via the car radio and found out that I was in the same boat as another quarter million people. I went home. (Temp = 57)

Barbara brought some Subway sandwiches home for dinner and about a half a dozen flashlights and twice as many batteries. At least now we could read. The paper said the outdoor temperature will drop to the mid-20's. I checked the inside temperature before going to sleep. (Temp = 54) The upstairs was definitely cooler than downstairs, so I took the couch and Barbara the love-seat, and the dogs moved back and forth from one to the other all night. By 3AM we were down to 44 degrees and it was getting hard to stay warm. We packed the dogs and visited Barb's sister across town, warmed up and watched some TV until morning.

Barb high tailed it to work and I went back home with the dogs to see what was going on. (Temp = 42) The dogs buried themselves in all the blankets on the floor and seemed to enjoy the distraction. Me, well I closed the bathroom door and took a hot shower. With the door closed it steamed up and wasn't too bad getting out of the shower. But man oh man, when I opened that door you could really feel the cold. Again I visited some clients because I really had work to do. Barbara at her office was looking for hotels that would except three dogs and two people as guests. Found one.

We met back at the house (Temp = 47), got the dogs and some amenities together and headed out for our hotel. Driving up the road we saw the crew coming in, about 6 lift trucks and several smaller vehicles with about twenty linemen walking around looking at all the poles. "We'll have power by morning," I told my captive audience.

Since we have an answering machine, I knew if I called and it answered the power would be on. About midnight I called home. It answered! We finished the night out at the hotel, got up early, didn't even shower. We just wanted to see and feel our home. And we did. (Temp = 68) Ahhh, home sweet home.

This was my first winter power outage. Summer power outages are much more common at my house and I worry more about cooling and saving the contents of the refrigerator. And then, after it all, I think this is nothing compared to a tsunami, earthquake or fire. I didn't lose anything. Life as I knew it continued without any major interruptions or changes. Time to help those that really need it.

Sixth Sense

The tsunami is a catastrophe that is hard to imagine and I can't say anything more than what all news agencies and blogs have been reporting.The little sidebar to this story does intrigue me. Did animals have quake warning? at the BBC and
Did Sixth Sense Save them? at CNN are just examples.

I am finding bodies of humans, but I have yet to see a dead animal,'' said Wijeyeratne, whose hotel in the park was totally destroyed in Sunday's tidal surge.

While I haven't experienced any calamity with my three dogs and one cat, I'm always amazed how they get skittish about five minutes before my wife arrives home after being gone for a while. I have found this to be reliable enough to go ahead and start dinner or order the pizza. They haven't missed yet!

Happy New Year!

At the time I am writing, half the world is already in the new year, many waking up with hangovers, not remembering a thing. I'm still working on the build-up to the new year, still shopping, getting party favors together, looking for the best piece of pork roast and gathering up pounds of sauerkraut.

It's been a good year, achieving some of my goals, missing on others and not even getting to a few. But every year we all get the chance to wipe the slate clean and start all over. So I'm off to review the lyrics to Auld Lang Syne. I know wherever I am tonight that song will come up over and over and over. And for the next week, whenever I see someone for the first time in '05, there will be the cheery "Happy New Year!"

So to all of my readers and visitors, have a safe, prosperous and healthy New Year!

And to All a Good Night

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.

-- Norman Vincent Peale

Yes I understand it's Christ's birthday and there is much religious significance to this time of year, but I enjoy buying gifts for friends and family. I like seeing that wide smile and even a little squeal when the gifts are exactly what they wanted. Yes it's better to give than receive, but I sure like getting presents too....any time of year.

So why can't we have this festive season all year 'round? What is it in the month of December that makes everyone just a bit more friendly? And why can't we use it in the other 11 months? Smile and make eye contact everyday and wish that someone a nice day, rather than just "Happy Holidays." If you're walking through a store and see something "just perfect for Aunt Gertrude," buy it and give it to her then rather than Christmas or her birthday. People are kinder and gentler during the Winter Solstice, so let's carry it through to Spring, Summer and Autumn.

"Peace on earth and goodwill toward men" has dwindled to the words inside of a greeting card, the meaning lost in its repetition. Any attempt to actually realize the concept is not even considered. It is hard to imagine a more inspiring blessing or a loftier goal -- at any time of year. So Merry Christmas everyone....and everyday for the next 364.

Saved by Blue Nile

In case anyone else finds themselves in a predicament, you have until 3PM EST Thursday, December 23 to order some jewelry online from the Blue Nile and still have it in time for Christmas. Good luck!

The Paradox Of Our Time

I received an e-mail today, just one of those holiday time greetings that went out to a couple hundred thousand people, meant to inspire and give you that warm fuzzy feeling. It was a poem-like essay titled The Paradox of our Time and attributed to George Carlin. I grew a little suspicious because there was not one cuss word in the entire diatribe.. It does make you think. So I thought I would surf over to George's web site to see if there was more info about his writing and was surprised to find a page on his site that denies the attribution of this essay to him!

So I Googled "The Paradox Of Our Time" and received the results....1,640,000 pages! The essay is attributed not only to Mr. Carlin but also to some fellow named Jeff Dickson, a "survivor of the Columbine shooting," and those famous authors "anonymous" and "unknown." Amazing.

So who is the author? Dr. Bob Moorehead, a pastor from the state of Washington. The essay appeared under the title "The Paradox of Our Age" in Words Aptly Spoken, Dr. Bob Moorehead's 1995 collection of prayers, homilies, and monologues used in his sermons and radio broadcasts. But before you go on to hold this pastor in high regard, he was forced to retire from his pastoral duties and found guilty of molesting several male churchgoers. Read the original essay and more about this Internet hoax at Snopes, the Urban Legend Reference Page. I had fun tracking this information around the Internet and it was eye-opening to learn about many Internet hoaxes.

But if you don't take the time to click over and read the entire essay, let me at least leave you with a tidbit:

Give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

HeeHee!

An actual court transcript:
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
   A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
   A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?
   A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
   A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
   A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
   A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing Law somewhere.

Finally

Sure the airwaves this evening are full of political pundits and wizards "calling" a state just seconds after the polls close, but.... commercials are back! Yes, they're still selling cars, beer and feminine products. I was so bored with all the political ads, I felt abandoned by all the product and service marketers. Sure I have premium cable and can get rid of the commercials any time I want, but I like watching movies and programs with commercials because I then have built-in pee breaks and raid-the-refrigerator timeouts every 15 minutes. And I know I won't miss any of the action.

This country and I will survive no matter who gets elected, some people will complain others will rejoice. And we will do it all over again in a few years. Ain't democracy great? Now let's check out some political-free advertisements. . . . . .

Polls, Polls, and more Polls

So many polls, so little time. Through my reading and through my e-mail, I receive many poll results from many sources. Since my interests run from business and technology to journalism and writing, I see two different worlds. Check this out on Slate.com

Thirty-one novelists participated, with four for Bush, 24 for Kerry, and three in a category of their own.

Mark me on the Bush side of the ledger, a lonely side for this survey, I'm certain. Most novelists live in their imagination, which is a fine place to be until the bad guys come knock knock knocking.

Who do you plan to vote for in the 2004 presidential election?
Bush: 52.1%
Kerry: 43.4%
Other: 1.2%
Undecided: 3.2%

Who do you think will win?
Bush: 60.5%
Kerry: 38.1%
Interestingly, 95% of Bush voters believe he will win, while 80% of Kerry voters think their candidate will win.

More Libraries Needed?

Akron has a new library. It's beautiful. The square footage has doubled and there are books and computers galore. Walking around I got to thinking, just how much information does a library hold?

According to a study by Microsoft, Intel, HP and EMC, the amount of new information stored on paper, film, optical and magnetic media reached about 5 exabytes in 2002. What's an exabyte you ask? That's a million terabytes. Still confused? How about a million million megabytes? Okay how about this -- you need about 500 million new average-sized PCs to hold the information! And that's just the new information produced in one year.

...the amount of new information captured has doubled in the last three years. New information produced in 2002 alone was equal in size to half a million new libraries, each containing a digitized version of the entire contents of the Library of Congress.

Are You A Blogaholic?

Both of my blogs have been sedate recently, not writing much but still reading and tracking many more. So when I saw the question, Are You A Blogaholic?, I thought I would really wimp out, but I scored a 60.

60 points is in the 51 through 80 percent
You are a dedicated weblogger. You post frequently because you enjoy weblogging a lot, yet you still manage to have a social life. You're the best kind of weblogger. Way to go!

Self-epitaphing

I've come across the exercise of writing your own obituary in several books and magazines, especially self-help and self-psychoanalysis books. It helps you review where you've been and how to redirect the remainder of your life. But here's a new twist: Tombstone Generator, write your own epitaph and see how it looks on an actual grave marker. If you haven't fulfilled your own epitaph yet, time to make some changes!

Going to the museum?

I always thought museums were penny-pinching, frugal organizations. . .until recently, while researching through Forbes magazine, I find that the head of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland makes $370,000 a year. The CEO of the National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum in Cooperstown, NY pulls down an annual salary of $312,000. I guess since rock stars and baseball players make big bucks, their museum curators should be in the same league. Oh well.

Something on Nothing

I have nothing to say. So, I'm going to say nothing. Rather than something, which is, of course, much harder to write about. Though, I suppose that should be qualified because some somethings are really nothing more than a nothing in disguise and are really no harder to write about than nothing. And some somethings are virtually everything and therefore virtually impossible to write about because there's just not there there, rendering them almost nothing and yet something regardless. This would probably be a good time to write an example of a nothing or a something, but let's face it somethings and nothings are notoriously hard to define.

Where do words go?

My word arsenal is empty. It's been a couple of weeks since I've written an article, white paper or just marketing copy. I feel barren, thinking this should not be. It's bringing me down. So where is my writer's ammunition?

It's not that I haven't tried. I've sat down to write many times at my laptop, but I quickly digress into web searches looking for information for some consulting work I'm doing. Ahh, that's it. Life is getting in the way. Some strange need to pay bills and eat has got me doing more than just writing.

Luckily I work best with about 5-6 hours sleep so I can get 19 hours of activities done in a day. When the opportunity arises, I can get some 1,000 words out in a day, in addition to working with a client. Other times I go to bed after one magnificent sentence has been created. Writer's constipation.

Do I need to go looking for words or will they just appear as quickly as they disappeared? Here words, words, words....

Happy Anniversary!

I've been so busy I just lived right through the anniversary of my first entry into this blog, July 25th, 2003:

What is this blogging shit? I've visited several sites that are interesting. Some are very "deep," others frivolous and some informative. So here I go on an adventure to see what I can find. . . inside myself. I'll let you know "write" here.

From Bad to Worse?

Did you hear about the British man who accidentally blew off his "family jewels" with a shotgun after drinking 15 bottles of beer? He was sentenced to five years in jail for possession of an illegal firearm! My question: Was he sent to a Men's or Women's prison?

Family Jewels

This brings on a whole new meaning to the term "Family Jewels" -- LifeGem.

A LifeGem is a certified, high quality diamond created from the carbon of your loved one as a memorial to their unique and wonderful life.

Holiday Frame of Mind

I'm in a holiday frame of mind. You're probably thinking Flag Day or maybe 4th of July. But no -- I'm thinking Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year holidays. Why you ask? Because I've got a couple proposals out for articles, and magazine editors usually work 4 to 6 months out. Some are working on issues for NEXT summer! So while trying to wrestle up some ideas for articles, I did a search for "lesser known" holidays thinking I could expand on the traditional stuff. Boy did I land a jackpot.

I missed National Doughnut Day last week. That's okay since I'm watching my carbs. Besides, it's within a day or two of National Hunger Awareness Day! If you can't believe there are so many weird observances, just wait for for Sunday, June 13 - International Skeptics Day, which is also the last day of Superman Week and the first day of National Flag Week. All this is within Potty Training Awareness Month.

We could have some messy parties on July 17th, which is both Cow Appreciation Day and Shark Awareness Day. Hmmm, if you appreciate your cow, stay away from the water. Others go together, like National Hamburger Day and National Mustard Day, August 7th. And I'm looking forward to both Nude Recreation Week, July 5-11 and September, which is Pleasure Your Mate Month. I don't know if it's a good or bad thing that they'll be over before October - National Family Sexuality Education Month.

And please don't whine about all this....National Whiner's Day is the day after Christmas.

A Literary Dream Job

Years ago, I dreamed of opening a book store, but that was before Borders, Barnes & Noble and Amazon..In Vermont, town browses for a new bookstore could be the seeds of another dream.

Clean!

Oh well, I feel good knowing I made a promise last week and kept it, and I also feel organized. The challenge is how long will my desk continue to be clean?

The Word Spy

The Word Spy web site is devoted to lexpionage, the sleuthing of new words and phrases. These aren't "stunt words" or "sniglets," but new terms that have appeared multiple times in newspapers, magazines, books, Web sites, and other recorded sources.

Every week the site posts The Top 100 Word Spy words as measured by page views from the past seven days. This weeks Top 5 are:

metrosexual
Google bombing
jump the shark
furkid
technosexual

Thou shalt catch all typos

Do you think someone who proofreads the Bible has more pressure on them than someone proofing a murder mystery? Bible proofreaders: Thou shalt catch all typos says "yes!"

"Bible readers are less forgiving of errors because they expect perfection in the Bible text."

My Desk Mess Redux

So I'm making a public promise to myself -- My desk will be clean by Labor Memorial Day. Oops, my subconscious is showing.

Strip Clubs Get Into Politics

Exotic dance clubs in about 18 states are registering voters says this AP news article: Strip club owners asking patrons to vote.

The adult entertainment industry hopes to sway the 2004 presidential election, saying President Bush's conservative agenda threatens their livelihood and jeopardizes the First Amendment.

War is Hell

"War is hell," and who among us want to "go to hell?" So how do I find out about what is going on there? Really going on. I trust the news agencies to deliver to me an accurate, timely accounting: who, what, where, when and why, and sometimes how. By answering those questions they give me all the information I need to react, feel, opine, and decide about what is happening in our world.

Give me the news, the facts. Don't hide, don't editorialize, don't exaggerate, don't exploit. Punch me in the stomach with it. The purpose of news reporting in a democracy is to enable people to know what is happening, and to understand events so that we can form our own conclusions.

Is there a code of ethics, best practices, or common thought that news agencies, editors and publishers adhere to? To not display images means ignoring the news, even if to display them may mean offending readers and viewers. The images of war are awful. But even our children need to know the truth. The grisly images of charred bodies, mangled bodies and yes embarrassed bodies are truthful and newsworthy.

To use what seems to be a cliché nowadays. All the pictures "strengthen my resolve" to support our government's fight on terror. I have seen the unedited pictures of the Nick Berg beheading, and yes, they make a very powerful statement and a very powerful case to kill the bastards who did this.

But I also believe that the "cleansed" pictures the media uses does not make the same statement. Those pictures rely on my imagination to complete the story, and my imagination cannot come up with something that gruesome. I choose to pay for my newspaper, just like I choose to pay for cable TV, so don't censor or soften the news. That's not what I pay you for. Just give me the news, no matter how bad it may be. I need to know.

Elvis Presley Died...again

As I grow older I find myself reading the obituaries more than when I was younger. If you find yourself in the same predicament and you've read all the obits in your local paper, you may want to try: The Blog of Death. It sounds gruesome, but is actually a nicely done collection of obituaries of famous and not so famous people who deserve to be remembered.

Elvis A. Presley, a Wisconsin resident with a passion for the king of rock 'n roll, died on April 26. Cause of death was not released. He was 67.

Born Herbert A. Baer, Presley legally changed his name in 1978 to honor his idol, Elvis. He spent 27 years working at the Neenah Foundry Co., a supplier of gray and ductile iron castings, until his retirement in 1998. In his spare time, Presley was an Elvis impersonator.

While I was thinking The Blog of Death was a unique site, a little googling on my part found some other sites as well: Legacy.com, Internet Obituary Network and the International Association of Obituarists, all sporting famous and not so famous obits. I also learned from both CBS and Newsweek that there is a growing interest in obituaries. Who'd of thunk it?

Doctor + Games = Good Surgeon

I haven't played computer games since the original Pong came out in the mid 70s. I could never get interested or excited about gaming. But, I will definitely ask the doctor, the next time I need surgery. Surgeons Who Play Video Games Err Less

Complaining about complaining

We're always complaining. I'm thinking this because many people, in newspapers, on TV, are complaining about the war, the hundreds of lives, the billions of dollars. But who are they complaining to? What is going to be done about it? Why don't they go over now and become human shields and save the military?

Yeah, I know, a bit facetious. I think people complain just to hear themselves. Okay, here's some complaint fodder I came across recently:

Every day around 140,000 people are injured on the world's roads. More than 3000 die, some 15,000 are disabled for life. Globally, according to conservative estimates, the annual costs of road traffic injuries amount to approximately US$700 billion.

Can you imagine giving up our cars? Boy, wouldn't we have to change the way we do things? We'd walk everywhere, and not only would we be a healthier nation, all the people complaining about obesity would shut up. I mean instead of doing something about anything we sit around and wait for it to change itself. "Why do we do this?" I ask myself. Well I think we are afraid of change. Our minds are to simple to actually put two and two together and think, "Hey.. I don't like how this is going. I think it's about time I go out, say and do the things others are too afraid to say and do."

On the other hand, it's so much easier to complain.

Light Reading Redux

"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax."
   -- Albert Einstein

A burdensome or excessive demand; a strain.

Light Reading

Well since it's only 3 days away, I thought I'd start on my taxes this weekend. Besides all the forms and associated pamphlets to read, the Tax Code is a measly 17,000 page conglomeration. But to get an understanding of all the rules and loopholes, you have to read through the 47,000 pages of the Internal Revenue Service Regulations and associated court cases. Good thing I'm a speed reader.

Income tax has only been with us for 90 years or so and the code back then was only 14 pages long. How do you "tweak" the rules over the years to add 16,986 more pages? I guess that's why 56% of the taxpayers pay someone else to prepare their forms. I'm wondering if it is the same 56% who oppose a simplified flat tax because they'd have to give up all their deductions....even if their tax bill would be less!!

And why do people want to repeal the tax cuts? Do people really think re-instituting the "marriage penalty" is fair? This crap about taxing the rich is even worse.

More Searching

I continued my research of search engines last night and found a few more very interesting sites.Vivisimo Clustering technology automatically categorizes textual information into meaningful, hierarchically sorted category folders.

Teoma does not rank results based upon the sites with the most links leading to them, like Google. Instead, Teoma analyzes the Web as it is organically organized—in naturally-occurring communities that are about or related to the same subject—to determine which sites are most relevant. After trying them out, I did find sites with each of these engines that I didn't find on Google. This is pretty cool stuff!

All these search engines that I've mentioned the last two days provide you with a list of links, some interesting, some good, some bad. You really don't know until you check out each of the links in a linear fashion. They are terrific tools when your plan is to spend some time surfing.

Now a completely different approach is GuruNet . GuruNet brought the answers to me in a quick, concise, authoritative, readable snapshot, instead of a list of hundreds or thousands of links for me to follow, one at a time. It was one neat package with the definition, biography, description and facts immediately, without the frustration of linear searching. Well for all this convenience you do have to pay for a subscription, but go ahead and try it for 14 days free. I'm just in my second day, but I'm thinking the 30 bucks may be worth it.

Searching, Searching, Searching

I spend much of my time researching. I'm either trying to flesh out an idea, looking for information for an article I'm writing, or researching for a client project. So I'm getting better and better at on-line searches. I picked up Google Hacks and learned quite a lot on Google specifically and searching in general. But there are many, many ways to search on the Internet so I needed more. I found SearchEngineWatch and it has everything about doing searches, optimizing searches, how to get placed on search engines, and plenty of reviews, ratings and test results.

You'll find links to all types of search engines. Yes there's the Major search engines like Google and Yahoo, but if you can't find it there, try AllTheWeb.com. How about engines just for kids, others for specific countries, shopping engines, and science engines? And more. Wow, I think I spent my whole day searching search engines. Cool! Now if I could just finish what I was looking for in the first place.

Just Do It Before It's Too Late

      "Hey Pete. You got any word processors around here? Maybe even a typewriter" I asked full of enthusiasm.
      Saint Peter looked surprised. "C'mon now AJ, I was there watching your writing career blossom, or is wilt the better word. Ha, ha, ha. Why didn't you write when you had the chance?"
      "Because," I sighed.
      "Yeah right," said Peter, "like that answer will get you anywhere around here." He turned to talk to more entrants coming through the pearly gates.

      I knew the executives in heaven would require detailed answers to any question they'd ask. But I wasn't prepared. Even after years and years of excuses for my procrastination, all that emotion, all that knowledge, all those ideas, were still inside my introverted life, and now death. I'm sure these guys in heaven already know the answers, so I'll just have to do a little research. Maybe an interview with God, yeah, that's it; He'll give me the answers I've been looking for.

      No matter how much I rationalized, I knew I didn't understand myself. Why didn't I write all those times I could have? I didn't write then because I didn't really have anything to write about. Not that I have anything to write about now. I just figured since I had nothing to write about then, I could write about why I didn't write yesterday which is because I had nothing to write about. Does that make sense???
No. I knew the real answer. I was just hoping nobody saw me.

      "Okay, okay, it was TCM," I cried to Peter.
      "What the hell is TCM? Wait, wait, wait, scratch that. What in heaven's name is TCM?"

      Hmmm, maybe they weren't watching my every move. But now is not the time to continue the big lie or the big excuse.

      I responded in disbelief. "Oh c'mon now, you gotta have TCM up here don't you? Turner Classic Movies?"

      Yep, that's a big problem. I'd be staring at a blank screen waiting for inspiration and just click over to TCM's website and see what was on the tube. I'd check what classic was coming on and rush over to the television and get settled in for Casablanca. No sooner does it start and I'm thinking to myself, "I can write something like that." The same thing would happen with Citizen Kane or Rear Window or The Big Chill, all wonderfully written stories that I know I will write when I get to "someday I'll."

      Now I began thinking about my own ideas and the way they tease me with their elusive natures. Sometimes I have so many I tell them to take a ticket and stand in line. At other times, I couldn't find one if I were given a roadmap to Ideaville. Will I get ideas in heaven?

      I let out a scream, "Why am I doing this?"

      Because writing has always been one of the most important things in my life. I don't just like writing, I need to write, and not just journal entries. I've been starting and then abandoning writing projects for years, from articles, to short stories to the great American novel, and I rarely finish anything -- I get started and then I lose interest, get distracted by something else, or my inner critic speaks up and tells me it's all stupid so I just give up.

      I need to think with a goal in mind, or better yet, a deadline. I can tell my inner critic to shut up for a week and just write. I may write crap and never do anything with the story once I'm finished with it, but at least I'll be writing something. It will be a learning experience and then, at the end, I can finally tell people, "You know how I've been saying for years that I'm going to write? Well, I finished a story." Bragging rights, you could say, and proving to everyone that yes, I am a writer. And, showing myself that I can do this. I can always go back and revise it, or reuse some of my ideas or passages in later stories. I just think it's time that I stopped talking and planning and thinking about it and actually writing something.

      Saint Peter moved closer as he cleared his throat. "Uh, too late, AJ. You're dead."

Day Late, Dollar Short

I had lunch with Mom and Dad this weekend and a few incidences came up about me as a "young man." It was great reminiscing and I thought I'd share one with you about my first car.

It was time to move on from my very first car, an old Ford Galaxy 500. My father gave it to me as a combined high school graduation, marriage and child birth gift. Yes, they all happened within months of each other. My life was coming together-- I had a job at the aluminum siding factory, I was studying at the local university and my daughter was healthy and growing. So I thought I'd trade in the "boat" for a nice economical subcompact Pinto. Remember the oil embargo?

I found the new used car at the local Ford dealer that Dad always used. The dealer offered five hundred dollars for the car as a trade-in. A deal was struck and I was to pick up the car and drop off my trade-in the next day.

My breath crystallized as I walked out of the factory in the early morning. My new car was the topic at all the breaks and lunch time conversations. I was going to play hooky, go home, clean up and get my new car….as it turns out, a day late.

It had snowed overnight. The roads were a bit slick and I found myself downshifting a few times just to get some traction, especially on the inclines. On a particularly steep hill I had downshifted all the way back to first gear just to get moving up the hill. I progressed slowly as fellow motorist kept honking their horns at me. The ones coming down the hill kept pointing to something below my car. It wasn't long before -- Whoosh! Smoke was all around the car. I did not realize that as I was moving a foot or two up the hill my wheels were spinning at 100 miles per hour.

I quickly put it in park and jumped out. It was 7AM and here I was knocking on the doors of strangers asking to use their phones. An elderly gentleman said he called the fire department, but didn't let me in. They were there within minutes putting out a flame underneath the hood.

I had it towed to a garage a mile up the road. "I just need to trade it in. . .in about three hours," I told the mechanic. "Can you make it work?" A buddy drove me home as I tried to figure out how to get my car without a trade-in.

A few hours later I returned to the garage. He said there was not much damage except for most of the wiring insulation had melted. I paid him 30 bucks for changing the cables (a fortune in the early 70's) and was on my way to the dealer.

I drove onto the lot and waved down my salesman. He said the mechanic would take the car for a test drive. As he got in and shut the door, both the driver side mirror and the spring in the driver's seat popped out. But, it started fine and he was on his way.

The entire dealership was wondering what might be taking him so long to go around the block until a phone call came in to Service for a tow truck. The car had stalled a couple blocks away. My five hundred dollar trade-in became a one hundred fifty dollar trade-in, mainly for parts I think. And I was a few dollars short.

P.S. Thanks Dad. Did I ever pay you back?

Blog Reader Survey

I am working on a client project in which I am researching various methods of gathering information. One of those methods being an online survey like this. I'm also wondering how it would do as an interview tool.

It is just an experiment, completely anonymous and only 9 questions. Please complete this survey about usage of the "Writing, Speaking and Thinking, Oh My!" weblog, as honestly as you can. My end result is to take a look at the various reports, but I figured I might as well try to get some useful information. I really appreciate your help.

Click here to take survey

Rejection Redux

Wow, a place for writers to commiserate and exult the rejection letter -- RejectionCollection.com. Read the letters and how they made the writer feel. Rub it in!

A Marrying kind of person?

With marriage being a hot issue in the election, as well as about the only thing you hear on news programs and late night TV, you have to wonder where are "they" going with this? There are all kinds of questions as to gender, sexuality, civility and spirituality, so maybe you can find some answers at marry your pet.

So, you adore your pet, consult him when channel switching and give him fresh fish every Sunday. But if you really love him and you're in this for life, isn't it time you married your pet?

If the element of sexuality is removed from the definition of marriage, then the marriage of human beings to inanimate objects becomes theoretically possible.

Spalding Gray found dead

Well I guess it wasn't a Premature Eulogy, as I questioned back in January. Spalding Gray has been missing since January 11th and the talk was that he was finally Swimming to Cambodia. MSNBC reports: Spalding Gray found dead. Sad, but not unexpected.

Bare Breast Good for Business?

I mentioned a few weeks ago how a jewelry merchant experienced an increase in sales because of Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction. Here's some mainstream news from digital-video company TiVo: 35,000 new subscribers signed up for the service because they regretted missing the chance to record the breast-baring incident. Read more about how JJ has increased the nations GDP. (free registration required if you aren't a Forbes.com user.)

What Controversy?

Just got back from watching The Passion of the Christ. We went to the 4:30PM showing, which was about half full. Good choice on our part since we watched the people empty out from the first showing, which was full, and saw a big crowd waiting to get in when we left. I do not consider myself a "deeply religious" person, but I do believe in God and was raised a catholic.

I know the story of the Passion, from the catholic school upbringing and from working on many productions of Godspell and Jesus Christ Superstar. This violent, graphic version moved me deeply and gave me a new perspective on what Jesus Christ did so many years ago. Yes, very violent, but I was not appalled, I cried and felt for the Man. I wanted to help him.

It's been a couple of hours and I am still thinking about it, sorting the movie through my mind again and again. Controversy? I don't think so. I did not leave thinking about Jews vs. Romans nor Pontius Pilate vs. Ciaphos...just the Passion. Thank you Mel for making the film. Saying I enjoyed it is not the right phrase; I felt it deeply and it will be with me for a long time.

Don't ever forget it!

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a twenty-dollar bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this twenty-dollar bill?"

Hands started going up.

"I am going to give this twenty-dollars to one of you, but first, let me do this."

He proceeded to crumple up the twenty-dollar bill. He then asked, "Who still wants it?" Still the hands were up in the air.

"Well," he replied, "What if I do this?"

And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up all crumpled and dirty. "Now, who still wants it?"

Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I do to the money, you still want it because it did not decrease in value. It is still worth twenty-dollars.

Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by who we are. You are special - Don't EVER forget it."

And one more thing

Ms. Jackson's breast-baring act has sparked a boom in the nipple-adornment and piercing business, retailers report nationwide. Florida distributor Russ Johnson of TheChainGang.com said that since the incident, he has sold more than 100 sunburst nipple shields like Jackson's--compared to only a couple in the weeks previous.

How the world sees us

Back a couple of weeks ago, I wrote about "the hoopla" on breasts, specifically Janet Jackson's. Well, I guess the rest of the world, outside the U.S. agrees with me. From an editorial in Spain's El Mundo:

If this had happened in Spain, people would merely laugh. But millions of Americans were scandalized, and are demanding that everyone connected with the breast baring be punished for polluting the airwaves. Is America still a nation of Puritans?

We, the poorly informed old Europeans, wouldn't have realized that Jackson's breast was a more important issue than Iraq's missing weapons of mass destruction. But the U.S. media is covering the breast-baring incident like the story of the century, repeatedly showing Jackson clutching at her chest, just in case a single American missed the "contaminating image."

Perhaps we should all grow up and stop making such a juvenile fuss over breasts.

What's particulary hard for Europeans to grasp is the moral standard that allows every Uzi and every explosion to be shown, but--for God's sake--no breast.

So That's Why

I'm wondering why I have trouble finding time, remembering, and communicating what really counts? Maybe you've thought that also. Well, this gives me some solace:

A single edition of the NY Times contains more information than the average person in the Middle Ages was exposed to in a lifetime. The average supermarket in the United States offers over 30,000 choices. Large bookstores carry over 130,000 titles. The average mind consumes over 9 hours of television, radio, newspapers, magazines, books and videos, every single day. That's 40,000 words a day, 280,000 words a week, and 14 million words a year.

Size matters for sex

We've heard this before but for a different organ - Brain size matters for sex.

..."a person's sex drive may be proportional to the size of their amygdala, a small 'emotion' center nestled at the base of the brain."

Here comes the sun. . .

Driving around town, meeting to meeting, I enjoyed the sun. The lack of sunlight has made me particularly crazy this winter. I can handle the snow, the cold and everything else winter has to throw at me, but this has been the darkest, gloomiest winter I remember going through in a long time. Official sundown time will hit 6:00PM this weekend, so it's time to start thinking Spring, since we're back to almost 11 hours of daylight!

Apology!

Man have I been busy! I'm sorry I haven't been keeping up. I got a few comments into my business blog because I was doing some research for a client, but otherwise I haven't had a free moment. And I miss checking up on all the blogs I usually visit in a day (or evening). I've scheduled some time with myself just to do some surfing and writing. I hope you have hung in also. Speaking of hung, this man's 60 seconds of fame has really paid-off. WilliamHung.biz and WillaimHung.net. His version of Ricky Martin's "She Bangs" is a classic.

What's the point?

With all the checking, re-checking and re-editing that will be a part of all commercial TV shows now, you can bet that the exodus to cable will not only continue, but increase. Just knowing that the "live" shows will be on a 5 minute delay takes some of the excitement out of it. NBC is re-editing ER to make sure everyone sees that there are no bare breasts in a hospital emergency room. Yeah right, reality.

And our sue-happy society is reveling in this:

A banker from Knoxville, Tenn., filed a class action lawsuit against Jackson, dance partner Justin Timberlake, CBS, halftime show producers MTV and the networks' parent company, Viacom. Terri Carlin said the "sexually explicit conduct" by the performers caused millions of people to "suffer outrage, anger, embarrassment and serious injury."

What's wrong with breasts?

Half the population is female and I'm sure they've checked out their own. Many men are married or in a relationship and I presume they open their eyes once in a while. Aren't most babies breastfed nowadays? So they've seen what they chomp on. Go into any museum and you can see all different sizes and shapes. So what's the big deal with Janet Jackson's right breast??

What will the investigators do?

"Ma'am, could you plop your right breast out here. I need to confirm that it's the one seen by millions on TV. Um,ah, can I get a closer look? Did you know it was going to pop out and when did you know it?"

Super Bowl Ads

Didn't watch the Super Bowl? Too stunned at halftime to continue watching? (and I don't mean because it was a great game:-) See all the ads here: Super Bowl Ads. We had some good ones this year.

Premature Eulogy?

Spalding Gray, the author of Swimming to Cambodia, Monster in a Box, It's a Slippery Slope and Gray's Anatomy was last seen at his home on Saturday, January 10th. Speculation grows on what happened to him since he has tried to destroy himself before. Severely depressed since an accident in 2001, he also worried much that he would die like his mother, who committed suicide years ago. He portends to be the stereotypical troubled author, who placed his wondering and troubled psyche into his work. A long-time friend, John Perry Barlow has written about Spalding, Is Spalding Gray Finally Swimming to Cambodia? Hopefully it is not a premature eulogy.

"Both seriously and humorously, more often both, he's been threatening for years to do himself in. Indeed, his jokes about suicide preserved him and certainly entertained me. But now that it's starting to look like he's actually gone and done it, suicide is not so amusing."

Writer's block

Plagued with writer's block the last couple of times I've sat down to write. It manifests itself when I choose to clean my desk rather than write. Or "do research" on the web. Or review my schedule. Or catch reruns of Matlock on TV. Or look out the window and moan about writer's block.

"Writing is easy, you just sit down at the typewriter, open up a vein, and bleed it out drop by drop."
-- Red Smith

My Desk Mess

My desk is a jungle with traps and mounds scattered throughout the desktop terrain. Piles and piles of “I’ve got to look at and act on this” papers, books and magazines are everywhere. The desk is U-shaped, attached to the wall, with filing cabinets underneath and a white Formica top, at least the areas I can see. The left side has rows and rows of books, while the right side has my collection of printers and hands. My computer is right in the middle.

Yes I have 2 printers side-by-side. One is my “draft” printer and the second, a large color printer, for the published stuff. Hands you ask? I collect ceramic body parts, mostly heads and hands of varying sizes.

About every two months I go through a cleaning phase where I reshuffle the drafts, publications and research, so as to prioritize for the umpteenth time. Some pieces are so old I actually throw them out, making for more “white space” on my desk. The remaining gets shuffled, looks neat for a while, and then starts getting in the way again.

I’ve got cabinets, loads of folders and label makers. Why won’t I just file it away? I went to pick up David Allen’s Getting Things Done. I’ll see if that helps. Here's a few snapshots of the mess:

      

Rejection Part 2

I was brooding about yesterday's rejection when I read Austalian writer Janette Turner Hospital's method of dealing with rejection and bad reviews:

"Have one stiff drink, say five Hail Mary's, and ten Fuck-You's, and get back to work."

Rejection

Not another one! Rejection slips are the reality of the writer's life. If you haven't received any, you really can't call yourself a writer. This time the editor wrote "It's not right for our magazine." I read between the lines and it came up "I didn't like it."

Sure it's discouraging, but persistence pays off. I make sure to remember that many outstanding authors have had works rejected time and time again -- J.D. Salinger, John Grisham, Michael Cunningham, J.P. Donleavy -- not that I'm on par with them, but misery does like company. And with company like that, it can't be all bad.

Dan Gutman, a children's book writer, has posted some commentary on the rejections he received on the way to get Honus & Me published. That's four years worth of rejection!

It's not the rejection that I mind. I value criticism. It's the "non-denial denial" that bothers me. What do you mean it's not right? I followed your guidelines. I've read your magazine. Couldn't you give me a little more criticism than a terse form letter? Oh, and by the way, the name's AJ, not "Dear Contributor."

Hmmm. You know reading my article after several weeks, there is an area or two that could use a revision. I guess I could rewrite a few paragraphs...

Happy New Year, of course

So after all this year-end reflection, time to set some goals for the new year. From habit, I guess, I always shoot for the trifecta of resolutions: Health, Wealth and Happiness. I ended up in 2003 four pounds lighter than I started. The only problem is that by June I was ten pounds lighter, so I gained 6 pounds in the last half of the year. While eating better will be a chore, it's excerise that I need. So I resolve to execerise three times a week. That's about double what I did in 03. And I hope it translates into ten fewer pounds.

Wealth, well, no gain, no loss. So I resolve to increase the intake from my consulting and writing gigs. That translates to signing on three new clients and publishing 6 additional articles.

If I accomplish all that, I'll be happier. And that means winning the trifecta. What about you?

Reflections

It's the time of year to reflect on the past year before setting goals for the next. So. . . One of the main reasons I started this blog is the same reason I write--I learn more when I write things down and when there is pressure to communicate what I've learned. The upshot is that operating the blog(s) has not only given me a repository of my thoughts in the writing, speaking, and consulting fields, but it also has increased the volume and quality of the yield. I know more, find more, and understand better than I ever have.

Of course, in terms of building a central repository, I have a huge body of pre-blog information I've gathered over the years; some of it is well organized for retrieval, using Personal Knowbase and Net Snippets. I started seeing the benefits of content management as soon as I started attaching keywords to everything I produced. The blog adds to that. . .while I add to the blog.

Besides writing here, I also write newsletters, training manuals, tutorials, articles, business plans, requests for proposals and multitudes of reports. I also have another blog: Project, Process and Business Improvement, which will go through a redesign, once this one is done.

We all have Genghis Khan tendencies

Check this National Geographic story -- 0.5% of the world's male population is a direct descendent of one man who lived 800 years ago. And that man may well have been Genghis Khan.
Genghis Khan a Prolific Lover, DNA Data Implies

On to the next day

It was a long day today -- actually yesterday, since it is now early morning of the day after Christmas. Would it not be great if we could keep this mood, this happiness and good cheer, all year long? Why do we save our smiles, our "please's and thank you's", our great dispositions for only a small part of the year? It's all in the attitude.

Christmas presents

Season's Greetings, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays - Peace and goodwill to all!

It's a white christmas here in Ohio. My morning was quiet and subdued. We got the family thing out of the way earlier in the week, so it's just me and Barbara today. We're going to do The Christmas Story routine and enjoy a chinese dinner at House of Hunan. We'll probably grab a movie also.

No socks and underwear this year! Just some useful and enjoyable gifts that will last...books. I received some reference books: latest editions of the Chicago Manual of Style and the Publication Manual of the APA. Also a real motivator book: The Book of Positive Quotations and an interesting read for my geek side: E=mc2. I love it!

What were you thinking?!

Okay, so your company name is Powergen. Cool. Your business has something to do with power. (actually big battery chargers). So you decide to open a subsidiary in Italy. Of course you need to start using the Italian language and its words. But really!!! Powergen-Italia? Yep, their website is www.powergenitalia.com. Boy, there's going to be a whole bunch of disappointed porn addicts.

Where's the grocery list?

I went grocery shopping Saturday morning. As I zigged and zagged up and down the aisles I kept hearing other shoppers talking -- behind me, the next aisle over, even at the deli counter.

"Do you want the 4oz or 8oz box of mushrooms?"
Silence.
"OK."

"Cheerios or Special K?"
More silence.
"OK."

As I turned around, I saw this especially boisterous women talking into her wrist. I didn't see her cellphone, so I chuckled for a moment. But what is this? Everyone's talking on cellphones in the store. Has the cell taken over the grocery list?

I had both of mine (cellphone and list) in my shirt pocket, but was able to complete my shopping tasks with only the list and a little imagination. As I continued my trek up and down the aisles, I kept a keen ear open to catch the bits of list phoning.

I could tell some shoppers had lost their list, others got in the mood for food items not on their list, and still others used the grocery store as an excuse.

"My husband doesn't suspect a thing," one shopper whispered as she sacked apples.

I could only guess what was being said, but it must have been serious. Her face furrowed until she spoke again.

"He won't do that. He doesn't know."

Then a smile on an intriguing flushed face.

"No I can't, not now. You'll have to wait," as she picked up speed in the aisle before saying goodbye.

Not only are grocery lists gone, but so are clandestine meetings in restaurant parking lots and darkened cars. Ahh technology. Don't you just love it?

Now, did she want the low-fat or the sugar-free?

Ladies and gentlemen, we have him.

Finally. Read about it directly from Iraqi bloggers. The Command Post - Iraq

"I really don't need it"

In the Sunday NY Times, on the Fashion & Style pages is an articles about guys poppin' pills,In an Oversexed Age, More Guys Take a Pill. It's about how younger and younger men take the blue (or yellow or orange) pill just to have the confidence to mate with ferocious women (or men) or to relieve anxiety caused by today's oversexed dating scenes.

The one thing I picked up on was a reference to a famous baseball player who said that he has tried Viagra, but didn't need it. Why would you take it if you didn't need it or want it, either recreationaly or for an ED problem? Does it make him less of a ballplayer? I don't care how he choosses to live his life. Overall, this article made it sound like Viagra is the thing to do.

It reminds me of the famous Clinton quote, "I smoked it, but I didn't inhale." Golly gee willikers, who cares? Does having toked on a doobie or popping a little blue pill define a person? Does it make him either good or bad? Sure you don't want a pot-head as president or maybe even as a friend, but does the medication one takes for physical or mental well-being an issue? Abuse yes, but use? No.

So I'm not sure how newsworthy the whole story is anyway, but since it ended up on "Fashion & Style" I guess it was there for entertainment quality, not news quality.

And if I'm real good. . .

Wouldn't this be a neat toy to have? ultimate boy's toy

Are you a freak?

Take this test to find out just how unique you really are! Answer 33 questions and see how you compare to the rest of the world. . . .or at least the group of people that take this test. So are you a freak? I came in at 75%.

And thanks to all with the kind words the last 3 months on my Third Nerve Palsy. The neuro-opthamologists has just given me the confirmation of a 100% recovery!

The game of RISK

Remember RISK? The game of world domination, war and power with all the colors of those tiny little armies. I don't quite remember how to play the game, but I think it was just a roll of the dice which determined winning or losing a battle.

While still in high school it was the game we all would get together to play. By the time we got to college, it became our drinking game. By the end of the night we really didn't care who won and who lost.

Oh, by the way, still seeing double, but I think it's getting better. At least the headaches are gone.

Third Nerve Palsy

I've been seeing double for 3 weeks now. Headaches galore. First I saw my regular doctor thinking I had a sinus infection. He gave me an antibiotic, which did get rid of the post-nasal drip down my throat. But then there was the double vision. I went and saw my opthamologist. He said it was out of his expertise so he refered me to a neuro-opthamologist. Talk about a specialty within a specialty.

He provided the diagnosis of Third Nerve Palsy. He also said that the body will repair the damage, but it may take 3-6 months. At least it wasn't a stroke or a brain malfunction. But still, nothing I can do?

Blackout again?

The recent blackout shows how some projects never end. Sure you could say the project was over and now we've gone into operational/maintenance mode. Bullshit! I remember the 1965 New York blackout. How New Yorkers came together in more ways than one (there was a rash of births 9 months after the blackout). And public and industry officials said that we must make sure this doesn't happen again.

And it didn't...until 1977, when KAboom....NY goes dark again. Meanwhile, all news accounts talked about the looting and the horror of it all. Everyone was surprised that such a thing could happen after we made the grid failsafe a decade ago.

And so here we go again. Politicians, committees, investigations and reports will tell us how we will make the power grid reliable...again. It was safe for 12 years, then 25 years. We should be good for another 50 years anyway :-)